During the lockdowns and the whole “covid crazy”, I couldn’t go out much, so stayed inside and blogged a lot. On multiple blogs, and some social media.
But now its may 2023, I can go outside as much as I want to, and I do, but when I’m home, I feel lost. I attended church on Sunday, and bible study on Thursdays, but other than that, there’s nothing. Endless hours of nothing.
And now I’m 45 and feel empty. I feel that I have no future and just nothing. I cant even explain how I feel.
And I’m not going to a psychologist again. They don’t listen, they just hear words and jump onto those.
Am I having a midlife crisis? I don’t know. I’m just sad and stuck and can’t do the things I really want to. What I really want to do, is move away, but I can’t. So I’m stuck in this endless nightmare and I keep trying new things, but I keep going around in circles.
ASD and me 